This sci-fi block buster falls short of what it could have been and should have been.
Gorgeous Mila Kunis graces the stage with her beautiful expressive eyes and curvaceous figure in an action fighter suit. She is joined by an alien genetical mash-up between a wolf and a human with the only visible sign being pointy elf ears (oh yeah, I was right into the elf ears), played by Channing Tatum. He is unfortunately on a par with our mate, Keau Reeves on the acting scale.
The story begins where 3 extremely long-lived lords and lady of the galaxy are fighting over Earth (apparently we're quite a desirable planet, nice to know). These three siblings: Titus, Balex and Kalique Abrasax, all covet our world, which used to be owned by their mother. She died in mysterious circumstances, so I wouldn't be trusting them with any trustworthy matters anytime soon.
An Earth girl (Kunis) is born to Russian star-loving parents and migrates to Chicago, America to a hard life of cleaning up after wealthy folks and spends a considerable part of the movie cleaning toilets. Enter the obligatory naked, bigheaded aliens who want to probe / destroy the poor girl, named Jupiter. Luckily Channing Tatum's Mister Caine (mister?) flys in on hover skates to save the day.
Where can I get me some of those hover skates? I need them. It gave me a Star War-like buzz of exhilaration. Cue lots of exciting action scenes that made me sit their grinning with a huge smile on my face (and of course the ever-awesome Sean Bean as the interesting, but under-utilised, Stinger).
A short time later when they launched into space to meet the fiendish Abrasax siblings, something disappointing happened to this movie that I was enjoying immensely. It became a yawn. Perhaps it was the lack of plot depth or perhaps the lucklustre acting from leading man, Caine. Maybe it was the boring and predictable save-the-wedding scene. A combination of things made the movie go downhill rapidly.
Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I went, and there were some brilliant things to love about Jupiter Ascending. The design of the space ships and the hover shoes and plasma shield technology made it worthwhile for me. The scene with the bees was most incredible too.
And who could resist the horde of gorgeous actors who might have just walked off the set of the latest vampire movie. Perhaps if you go in expecting a Rotten-Tomatoes rating of 1 star / tomato, you will find it exceeds expectations.
Suspend your disbelief and go ahead, give Jupiter Ascending a go. 4 stars from me.
NB: It has just aired here in Australia, but I notice there is a release date of the 25th of July 2014 on the poster to the right here. When did it open in your town? and did you like it?